its not easy being ok when really not. i gave john everything. every " i love you"s are true, i mean all those words. i love him so much, but i think he does not give a damn. its too heartbreaking leaving him for myself. i gave my world, it surrounds him.. so much effort. why can't he just love me back??, i rarely care about his achievement as a person, because i love him for who he was. im just soooo drained, i feel too empty because i lost me. my soul and spirit are the ones that are left. he leaves no option for me to consider, what he done is just unbearable, i love him for who he was with no other bitches attached. damn , i hate myself for that matter. i really do, i cant do this anymore..